The Daily Gripe #12 - The Bird

It's time for The Daily Gripe, from Average Joe American.

The other day I was driving home from work on a stretch of two-lane state highway. As I stopped at a four-way stop in a very short four-lane section of the road, a car on the cross street turned very slowly in front of me. He turned from the left into the left lane. I was in the right lane.

Not wanting to be held up by such a slow car, I accelerated quickly past him. Did you ever notice that you can tell when one of the neanderthal's in modern society is about to show his stupidity? I could tell this guy was about to have a problem -- he needed to reassert his manhood. While I drove seventy in a fifty-five speed zone, Mr. Marvelous passed me in the oncoming lane. He sped ahead until he was a prudent distance from me. Then, to less than my surprise, a bird flew right out the driver's front window. That's right, he flipped me the bird. That really gripes me!

To make matters worse, just a half mile up the road he turned right and left the main highway, anyway. I was going seventy when he passed me and proudly displayed his middle digit. There's no way I was holding him up, and he certainly didn't arrive at his destination any faster by passing me just to turn half a mile later.

Why do people have such fits of insanity? What made this guy think I needed to see him flipping me off out the window?

To my credit (if I say so myself), I handled the situation very calmly this time. Much calmer than the idiot with the bird out the window did. I did absolutely nothing to even acknowledge the situation or the bird flipper.

Joe